I'm starting to get questioning looks. A girl at work complimented my black dress today and her stare lingered at my belly. The dress is plain and I've worn it a bunch of times. Hmm....
It doesn't seem right that I'm still not in the "clear" but my belly is starting to spread the news. Despite only being 7 weeks along, it looks like I swallowed an eggplant.
It is definitely time to implement the "decoy" (see entry from last week).
I haven't started waddling yet but I'm sure it's only a matter of weeks.
Monday, September 27, 2010
To Tell or Not To Tell?
We are headed to Washington, DC this weekend. He has to go for work and since he's my injection administrator, I bought a ticket to go with him months ago--in case we were doing another round of shots. Luckily, I'm hopefully done with injections for a while and can just enjoy a fun weekend away with him.
I convinced my parents to come spend the weekend with us. Since they live in New York and we live in California I welcome any opportunity to see them outside of the regular Christmas and annual summer visits.
Last month, I kept thinking, "Wouldn't it be great if we had news to share with them in DC!" I could tell them in person, which otherwise would be a rare opportunity.
Now that I have good news to share I'm conflicted. Max would prefer that we wait because next weekend I'll still only be 8 weeks along. However, he's leaving it up to me. Part of me thinks that if Friday's second ultrasound goes well, I may spill the beans this weekend. The other part of me thinks it would be hilarious to wait until Christmas when hopefully my belly will speak for itself.
Talk about extremes! The middle ground, and what we'll probably choose, is to skype with them on Thanksgiving while visiting my sister and her family. That way we can tell everyone together and no one (except us) will need to keep a secret.
That brings us to my husband's very large family--he's the youngest of eight; there are a dozen nieces and nephews on that side; and, we're the last hope for more babies. I'd rather tell them all at once too to avoid a game of "telephone" where the story is that I'm now having quintuplets. It sounds like we may need to host a family dinner in early December after I tell my family on Thanksgiving.
And, what about close friends and coworkers? Can I tell them before my own parents? They see me everday and if they haven't already, they'll start noticing a growing belly. But for now, I'll keep chomping on pretzels and saltines and hope no one asks me inappropriate questions about my growing waistline.
I convinced my parents to come spend the weekend with us. Since they live in New York and we live in California I welcome any opportunity to see them outside of the regular Christmas and annual summer visits.
Last month, I kept thinking, "Wouldn't it be great if we had news to share with them in DC!" I could tell them in person, which otherwise would be a rare opportunity.
Now that I have good news to share I'm conflicted. Max would prefer that we wait because next weekend I'll still only be 8 weeks along. However, he's leaving it up to me. Part of me thinks that if Friday's second ultrasound goes well, I may spill the beans this weekend. The other part of me thinks it would be hilarious to wait until Christmas when hopefully my belly will speak for itself.
Talk about extremes! The middle ground, and what we'll probably choose, is to skype with them on Thanksgiving while visiting my sister and her family. That way we can tell everyone together and no one (except us) will need to keep a secret.
That brings us to my husband's very large family--he's the youngest of eight; there are a dozen nieces and nephews on that side; and, we're the last hope for more babies. I'd rather tell them all at once too to avoid a game of "telephone" where the story is that I'm now having quintuplets. It sounds like we may need to host a family dinner in early December after I tell my family on Thanksgiving.
And, what about close friends and coworkers? Can I tell them before my own parents? They see me everday and if they haven't already, they'll start noticing a growing belly. But for now, I'll keep chomping on pretzels and saltines and hope no one asks me inappropriate questions about my growing waistline.
Friday, September 24, 2010
Two Against One
They said it would happen. I hoped they were wrong and that I'd be immune. The morning sickness has settled in and like an annoying relative sleeping on your couch, she's not showing any signs of leaving anytime soon. She lingers around day and night and is only appeased with saltines and pretzels.
Yes, overall this is a welcome feeling. It reminds me that I am finally pregnant. It's real! It gives me comfort that things are happening in my body--some more pleasant than others.
I try not to complain about it. As Max reminds me when I "report" on my nausea, we worked so hard to get to this place--dry heaving and all.
Last night the ravenous belly struck again. It usually happens as I climb into bed upon returning from the ceremonial middle of the night pee.
Last night I was desperate and couldn't handle the hunger pains so I bumped my way to the kitchen, tore open a new sleeve of saltines (like an addict pushing her way to her drug) and returned to bed.
Max is very tidy. Max DOES NOT support eating in bed....ever. He insisted that I get out of bed and eat in the kitchen or another approved eating location.
I refused and said, "It's two against one now. We want crackers and they are staying."
To which he replied, "It's starting already?"
Yes, Pipa is already taking my side and Pipa loves snacks in bed.
Yes, overall this is a welcome feeling. It reminds me that I am finally pregnant. It's real! It gives me comfort that things are happening in my body--some more pleasant than others.
I try not to complain about it. As Max reminds me when I "report" on my nausea, we worked so hard to get to this place--dry heaving and all.
Last night the ravenous belly struck again. It usually happens as I climb into bed upon returning from the ceremonial middle of the night pee.
Last night I was desperate and couldn't handle the hunger pains so I bumped my way to the kitchen, tore open a new sleeve of saltines (like an addict pushing her way to her drug) and returned to bed.
Max is very tidy. Max DOES NOT support eating in bed....ever. He insisted that I get out of bed and eat in the kitchen or another approved eating location.
I refused and said, "It's two against one now. We want crackers and they are staying."
To which he replied, "It's starting already?"
Yes, Pipa is already taking my side and Pipa loves snacks in bed.
Monday, September 20, 2010
Decoy
For the last two plus years of trying to conceive I've been thinking about a great trick to outsmart co-workers that suspect pregnancy.
In our work bathroom there is a tray of tampons and maxi pads near the sink. Starting next week, whenever there are other people (that I know) I am going to reach for a tampon before heading into the stall.
C'mon, isn't that brilliant?!
In our work bathroom there is a tray of tampons and maxi pads near the sink. Starting next week, whenever there are other people (that I know) I am going to reach for a tampon before heading into the stall.
C'mon, isn't that brilliant?!
Pipa
Today we saw Pipa (pronounced pee-pa) and its heartbeat. Sigh....
I feel some relief. I also feel more nausea. Not that I'm complaining...yet.
Pipa is measuring well based on the calendar. We get to see her/him again October 1.
BTW, Pipa is what we call our embryo since it means fruit seed (or pit!) in Spanish. Someone told me that language is discernable in utero. We have been speaking more and more Spanish in our home in hopes that Pipa can start learning it.
I feel some relief. I also feel more nausea. Not that I'm complaining...yet.
Pipa is measuring well based on the calendar. We get to see her/him again October 1.
BTW, Pipa is what we call our embryo since it means fruit seed (or pit!) in Spanish. Someone told me that language is discernable in utero. We have been speaking more and more Spanish in our home in hopes that Pipa can start learning it.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
The Long Wait
I'm finding that waiting for my first ultrasound is much harder than the 2ww. It's hard to not get ahead of myself and think about a due date, a baby-moon, maternity leave, strollers, etc.
Then there are the fears--should I have insisted on a third beta? Is this cramping a bad sign? Why don't I feel nauseated today?
I try hard to "forget" that I had two good betas. However, the frequent peeing and the cramping remind me.
I'm starting to understand why Tom Cruise had an ultrasound machine at home while Katie was pregnant. I'd be peeking at the little orange seed every day to say hello.
I'm praying we get good news at Monday's ultrasound and that some of my fears will be relieved.
Then there are the fears--should I have insisted on a third beta? Is this cramping a bad sign? Why don't I feel nauseated today?
I try hard to "forget" that I had two good betas. However, the frequent peeing and the cramping remind me.
I'm starting to understand why Tom Cruise had an ultrasound machine at home while Katie was pregnant. I'd be peeking at the little orange seed every day to say hello.
I'm praying we get good news at Monday's ultrasound and that some of my fears will be relieved.
Friday, September 10, 2010
Stock up and Save!
When I was about 13 years old I became obsessed with store circulars that come in the Sunday newspaper--especially those for drugstores like CVS, Walgreens, etc. So many things on sale!
It is here that I learned the wonderful concept of "stock up and save". You could pay half price on staples like toothpaste and toilet paper--only catch, you had to buy half a dozen.
I remember being a teenager and wondering why do home pregnancy tests go on sale? Stock up and save on home pregnancy tests? Since when are HPTs "staples"? That sounded like only something promiscuous girls would find to be a great bargain.
Some context to help you: I was a very sheltered child. In my pea-sized brain, one (usually a teenage girl) bought a home pregnancy test because she was "late". No one ever hoped the test would be positive. Positive results were always feared.
Fast-forward 15 years: The store circular obsession continues and I still consider "reading the paper" to be thumping through the circulars to see this week's deals. However, over the last few years I raced to the "feminine" section of the flyer hoping ovulation predictor kits and home pregnancy tests were on sale. Unlike the teenage girls, I prayed I'd get a positive result. Home testing kits have become a staple in my house.
For the first time last night, I used an HPT and got the result I had been wanting for years. Yes, I had already had two beta tests which showed positive but I peed on a stick for the ceremonial aspect.
I danced into the living room and showed Max the stick. We squealed with joy and took pictures of it. It wasn't exactly as I had fantasized (since we knew the answer) but fun nonetheless.
I'll probably still continue to buy HPTs when they are a good price because I think they have a long shelf life.
It is here that I learned the wonderful concept of "stock up and save". You could pay half price on staples like toothpaste and toilet paper--only catch, you had to buy half a dozen.
I remember being a teenager and wondering why do home pregnancy tests go on sale? Stock up and save on home pregnancy tests? Since when are HPTs "staples"? That sounded like only something promiscuous girls would find to be a great bargain.
Some context to help you: I was a very sheltered child. In my pea-sized brain, one (usually a teenage girl) bought a home pregnancy test because she was "late". No one ever hoped the test would be positive. Positive results were always feared.
Fast-forward 15 years: The store circular obsession continues and I still consider "reading the paper" to be thumping through the circulars to see this week's deals. However, over the last few years I raced to the "feminine" section of the flyer hoping ovulation predictor kits and home pregnancy tests were on sale. Unlike the teenage girls, I prayed I'd get a positive result. Home testing kits have become a staple in my house.
For the first time last night, I used an HPT and got the result I had been wanting for years. Yes, I had already had two beta tests which showed positive but I peed on a stick for the ceremonial aspect.
I danced into the living room and showed Max the stick. We squealed with joy and took pictures of it. It wasn't exactly as I had fantasized (since we knew the answer) but fun nonetheless.
I'll probably still continue to buy HPTs when they are a good price because I think they have a long shelf life.
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